Monday, September 22, 2003
Gale Norton
Secretary of Interior
1489 C Street NW
Washington, DC
20240
Dear Secretary Norton,
You will probably be hearing from the Ford Motor Company pretty soon. I just wrote to William Clay Ford, Jr. and gave him a fantastic idea: They’re going to build an SUV called The Ford Norton.
Are you and Condoleezza Rice speaking to each other? I’ve been worried there might be some hard feelings because she had an oil tanker named after her, and you haven’t gotten any credit for anything. Just so you can breathe easier (breathe easier--get it?), Chevron dropped Condoleezza Rice’s name from their ship, and they’re now calling it the Altair Voyager. (Do you know who Altair is?)
Anyway, won’t she be surprised when she learns that you’ve had an SUV named after you?! If I were you I wouldn’t gloat--just act real matter-of-fact about the whole thing. You could say something like, “Oh, doesn’t everybody have a vehicle named after them?’
The Ford Norton: For a Balanced Approach!
The Ford Norton: Built with Sound Science!
The Ford Norton: Great Gas Mileage AND Economical! (8mpg on the highway,
6 mpg in town.)
Sincerely,
Carl Estrada